
19 Dec 23 What Makes a Good Mentor?
Contents
- Introduction
- How to mentor somebody effectively
- 5 Essential Qualities of a Mentor
- 5 Vital Mentoring skills
- 5 Actions Good Mentors regularly take
- How to Assess the impact of a good mentor
- What can senior leadership do to support good mentoring practices?
Introduction
Within universities, workplaces, and other organisations, you will often hear people discussing the importance of having a good mentor. The benefits of having a trusted person in your life, to provide guidance and to support you in your personal development, have been proven time and time again. But how do you find a mentor who will be the right fit for you? And if you’ve taken on a mentor role yourself, how can you be sure that you’re being effective in your practice?
In this article, we’ve compiled advice and wisdom from expert members of our team about what makes a good mentor. We will discuss the positive personality traits, skills to acquire, and practical methods to help mentors to improve their core skills, and mentees to seek out the mentor figure who will help them to achieve their goals. Read on to find out more.
How to mentor somebody effectively
If you are approached by somebody to be their mentor, or are taking part in a mentorship programme for the first time and taking on the mentor role, it can be an exciting time. Many first-time mentors are eager to share their knowledge, and support people within the same industry or academic circles to progress.
However, there are certain things you may wish to consider at the outset, before taking on a mentee. Being a mentor can be quite a significant responsibility, so here is our advice to ensure you are able to be effective in the mentor role.
1. Think critically about whether you would be a good mentor/mentee pairing.
If somebody has approached you and asked for your mentorship and guidance, it may feel churlish to decline their request. But there are times when the most helpful thing that you can do for a potential mentee, is to refer them to somebody else — whether this is a colleague, or another industry expert, who may better align with their goals and objectives.
Of course, this will not always be the case. But with the mentor/mentee relationship being so important, you should make sure that you’re satisfied that a person will be a good pairing in terms of expertise, temperament, and what they are aiming to achieve from being mentored. If you feel on your initial meeting that the pairing seems positive, you can certainly choose to discuss it further.
2. Consider your own capacity to support others.
Another critical consideration to take on board, if your current capacity to act as a mentor to somebody else. We know that mentorship tends to succeed the most when both parties are able to invest time and effort into the relationship. If you know that you already have a lot on your plate, whether it’s work, family commitments, or other responsibilities, it may not be the right time for you to take on a mentee.
Overcommitment can lead to exhaustion, increased levels of stress and even burnout. Although it is wonderful to support others and share your expertise where you can, consider whether the timing is right for you, and whether you’d be able to realistically invest enough in the relationship to make it beneficial for you both.
3. Set expectations and discuss mentorship goals.
Once you’ve determined that you may have a suitable mentoring match, and have the time required to put into mentoring another person, you should arrange a meeting with your potential mentee. Use this time to clearly discuss their goals, and what they expect from you as a mentor.
It is vital to determine this at the outset, as individuals often have different ideas of what the mentoring relationship will look like. For instance, your mentee may expect weekly meetings, whereas you feel that once a month will be more than sufficient. Or, they may have unrealistic goals in mind when it comes to what they will achieve in the next year, and need your expertise to form a more suitable timeline.
These conversations can be a good way to avoid any potential frustration or disappointment, when the expectations of the mentor and mentee are different
4. Determine what success looks like, and turn your initial goals into SMART goals.
Similar to the expectation-setting meeting above, you should also speak to your mentee and ask them to get as specific as possible with their goals, and agree on how you will know that they’ve been achieved.
We recommend using the SMART goal framework with your mentee, and working with them to ensure that their mentorship goals are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and time-based. If you’d like further guidance on goal-setting, you may like to read our guide to the importance of setting goals in mentoring.
How to mentor somebody at work
Whilst mentoring in the workplace requires the same considerations as mentoring within other environments, there can be some extra considerations that you should take into account.
You should still ensure that you’re the most suitable mentor for your potential mentee, have the capacity to support them, and are aligned when it comes to your expectations. However, you should also consider:
Workplace policies
Does your place of work require you to discuss potential mentoring opportunities with your immediate line manager? And, is your potential mentee’s line manager aware that they’ve approached you, or vice versa?
Mentoring relationships in the workplace may not always be suitable, if the mentor is delivering guidance and support which interferes with the person’s manager, or even contradicts guidance they have been given by more senior staff. We’d recommend being transparent with both senior leadership and your workplace’s Human Resources (HR) professionals before embarking on a mentoring journey together.
Existing resources
It’s also worth discussing with your senior leadership team, to see if there is already a mentorship programme which is being used within your place of work. An existing mentoring programme, or framework that has been designed to fit your company, could help you to deliver a better experience to your mentee, and give you access to guidance and resources you may not otherwise have had.
However, if your place of work doesn’t currently have a mentoring programme in place, this could be a real opportunity for you as a team member to add value. If you’re interested in setting up a mentoring programme at your place of work, you may like to learn more about our suite of mentorship software solutions.
We’ve worked with a wide range of organisations, from businesses, to non-profits, and universities, to implement effective mentoring programmes, supported by intelligent software solutions that allow you to easily pair mentors, track progress, and much more.
Visit our solutions page to learn more about sfG MentorNet, or book a free, no-obligation demonstration of our industry-leading software.
5 Essential Qualities of a Mentor
There are a number of qualities that a good mentor should have, which will help them to develop an interpersonal relationship with their mentee, guide them appropriately, and plan effectively for future success. However, we’ve identified the top five qualities that we believe are essential to delivering outstanding mentorship.
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Expertise
Although it may seem self-explanatory, to take on the role of a mentor, you will need to have a suitable level of expertise in your chosen topic. Although you don’t need to be an expert in every area, in order to guide your mentee, you should at least have some specialism in their area of interest, and ideally some practical experience of the topic as well.
Peer-to-peer mentoring will often take place between employees or students on a similar footing and is a valid form of mentorship. However, if you’re mentoring a peer, you should make sure you have relevant knowledge to share that will benefit them, and that they have not yet acquired, in order to mentor them effectively.
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Motivation
Mentors should ideally be engaged and self-motivated, in order to take on the role for the benefit of somebody else. Whilst there are a number of benefits that can come from being a mentor, the most tangible benefits are normally felt by the mentee. Therefore, a mentor should ideally gain enjoyment, satisfaction, or both from their role, and not rely on or expect accolades for the work they’re doing.
Mentoring can sometimes be a difficult undertaking, so having internal rather than external motivation will help you to give it your best, even on days when you find it hard.
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Empathy
A core personality trait which has been identified as beneficial for mentors, coaches, and teachers alike, is empathy. Being able to put yourself in your mentee’s shoes, and understand the challenges that they face, will help you to deliver the best style of mentoring for their situation.
Empathy will help you to meet your mentee where they are, have productive conversations around the areas in which they can improve, and deliver constructive feedback which won’t discourage or frustrate them. Mentors who practise empathetic communication typically enjoy more rewarding mentoring relationships, and mentees who are more able to thrive.
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Enthusiasm
At times when your mentees face setbacks or blockers in their journey towards personal development, having a mentor who is enthusiastic can help them to engage more with their mentoring programme. Nothing worth having comes easy, and being able to buoy your mentee’s spirits by giving qualified praise and remaining future-focussed can lead to better outcomes all around.
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Growth mindset
You may often hear individuals in the mentoring and coaching space discuss the importance of having a ‘growth mindset’. As opposed to a ‘fixed mindset’, when people see their skills as innate and unchangeable, having a growth mindset refers to the belief that our abilities can be improved and developed through hard work and perseverance.
As well as being a positive personality trait in its own right, having a growth mindset not only gives you greater belief in your own abilities, but means that you believe in other people’s capacity to improve as well. By instilling a growth mindset into your mentees, you encourage them to achieve more, and not to be discouraged when things don’t go their way. A growth mindset will not only benefit your mentees, but will also allow you to grow and develop in your role as a mentor too.
5 Vital Mentoring skills
As well as personality traits which can help mentors to perform their role effectively, there are also a number of hard and soft skills that can make all the difference. We’ve chosen our top five skills which can be used to facilitate a positive mentoring relationship, and when mastered, can help you in your everyday life as well.
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Organisation
One of the core skills that we’d recommend for mentors, particularly those with more than one mentee, is to pay attention to your organisation. Whereas many mentoring programmes provide a supportive framework for mentors, with prompts to help them stay organised, you may need to develop your own organisational system to manage your mentoring responsibilities.
Digital calendars, and calendar management tools like Calendly, can help you to keep track of your regular check-ins with mentees, or any other review meetings you may have. You may also want to consider how you will record these meetings, as well as tracking the progress your mentee is making towards their goals.
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Goal Setting
Although it may seem as simple as asking your mentee what they want to achieve, the importance of intelligent goal-setting cannot be overstated, and is an area where many mentees require guidance from somebody more experienced.
We have already mentioned the SMART goal framework. Using your own expertise in your mentee’s area of interest can help you to guide them on what is achievable within a given timeframe, what goals will benefit them the most, and what steps they can take to make progress towards them.
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Relationship-building
Although the relationship between the mentor and mentee is one of the most important, a mentor can also support their mentees by making connections and networking outside the mentoring relationships. Being able to inform mentees of which industry thought leaders they should be paying attention to, any workshops they can attend, or even helping them to make connections in their chosen field of study can be truly transformative.
Good relationship-building is a skill that facilitates knowledge-sharing, not only between yourself and your mentee, but other individuals in your professional or academic network.
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Communication
Although we have already covered the importance of empathetic communication, and how it can be used to create positive and trusting mentoring relationships, this is not the only communication skill that is beneficial. Being able to speak honestly and candidly to your mentee will help them to identify areas for improvement, and give guidance in areas they may not have been aware were important for their development.
Although praise and acknowledging success is essential, to provide a fully rounded mentoring experience, you should also feel comfortable discussing your mentee’s potential weakness, or skills that may be missing from their toolkit. If this is an area that interests you, the book Radical Candor by Kim Scott is an excellent resource.
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Problem-solving
Creative problem-solving skills are something that you as a mentor can bring to the table, which will help your mentee to develop their own critical thinking skills. Sometimes a key part of the mentor/mentee relationship is for your mentee to have somebody to bounce ideas off of, and give them perspectives that they may not have previously considered.
Although you may expect to give support and encouragement when your mentee experiences a problem or setback, being able to share creative solutions and discuss them between yourselves can be extremely valuable to their development — and yours!
5 Actions Good Mentors regularly take
As well as the innate qualities and practised skills that you bring to your mentorship, there are also regular actions that you can take to begin building a framework and structure for your mentoring relationship. Many in-house mentoring programmes should include a basic structure for you and your mentee to follow, but if you don’t yet have a framework, we would recommend making sure that some of the following actions are included.
These actions, if taken at regular intervals throughout the mentoring relationship, should help your mentee to progress towards their goals. However, the frequency with which you perform these actions is completely up to you.
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Check-ins
Regular check-in meetings will help you to maintain a positive relationship with your mentee, as well as giving them an opportunity to bring up any issues or challenges they have been facing.
These can be as formal or informal as you like, and you have the choice of whether you’d like to conduct them in–person or virtually. However, regular check-ins with your mentee will be essential to their continued growth, and will allow you to monitor their progress and provide targeted guidance where they need it most.
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Active listening
Although some may consider this more of a skill, than an action, active listening is a practice which must be repeated regularly in order to be effective. Active listening involves being 100% attentive to the things your mentee is telling you, paying attention to their body language, and resisting the urge to interrupt, even when you feel the need to offer solutions or insights.
Active listening helps to cement a trusting relationship between you and your mentee, and prevents us from making assumptions based on only partial information. Active listening skills such as providing useful prompts, summarising what your mentee has told you to demonstrate understanding, and showing that you are engaged with what they are saying can be very meaningful for the person being listened to.
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Guiding efforts
Although there is an important place for active listening, there will also be times when you must employ clear guidance and give actionable steps to your mentees. Allow them to benefit from your knowledge and experience by informing them of areas of study they should look into, helpful skills they can build, and even authors and researchers whose work they should read.
You should ideally finish each of your check-ins with at least one action that your mentee can take, before they next see you. This contributes to having a positive structure for your mentoring relationship, and helps to keep you both accountable. They must make sure to take the steps required for them to improve, whereas you should follow up on the actions from your previous session, to ensure progress is made and address any blockers they are experiencing.
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Tracking progress
Whether you choose to track progress in a shared document or spreadsheet, use online mentoring tools, or purpose-built mentoring software, tracking your mentee’s progress should be a collaborative process. Whatever format you pick, you should each have full visibility over the steps that have been taken so far, as well as any challenges that your mentee has encountered.
It can be easy to forget when milestones have been achieved on the way to a person’s goals. Keeping a record of what steps have been taken, the results, and any significant wins can help to keep both of you engaged in the mentoring process.
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Reviewing goals
Although SMART goal-setting is an early step in the mentorship process, there may be times when it becomes necessary to revisit and review the initial goals that your mentee has set themselves. Circumstances may change, or you may find the timeline to achieving these goals may have been longer, or shorter, than you anticipated.
It is often important to stick to your goals, but don’t fall into the trap of being too inflexible. If, in practice, the initial goals that were set won’t be achievable when you’re halfway through the timeline, it can be more beneficial to tweak the goal, in order to keep your mentee engaged. Aiming for an impossible goal can be discouraging, whereas working towards one that may still be achieved usually leads to better outcomes, and more positive feelings all around.
How to assess the impact of a good mentor
Another area that some mentors find difficult to navigate is how they can measure the success of their mentorship. Even with robust goal-setting and tracking of progress, it can sometimes be difficult to measure the impact of mentorship — particularly if you have to gain buy-in and approval from more senior members of staff in your organisation.
Here are just a few ways that we have found are helpful for mentors to measure the impact they can have, not only on their mentees, but on an even larger scale.
Progress made on goals
It may appear obvious, but this is where the goal-setting and progress tracking done with your mentees can be extremely helpful. But you don’t need to be as myopic as to think only in terms of your mentee’s individual goals. How might your mentorship, and your mentee’s improved knowledge and skills, have contributed to even larger objectives?
For instance, if you work for a business who is looking to improve employee engagement and is measuring this using surveys, your mentee may find they are much happier and more proactive at work as a result of the time you’ve invested in them. Therefore, you have both contributed to the business’s wider objectives, and could make a strong case for expanding the internal mentorship offering.
Organisations often have goals that go beyond just revenue and conversions, so if you can demonstrate your impact in this regard, it can speak to the success of your mentorship and the methods you have used.
Personal growth
Although this is not as quantifiable as business goals or progress tracking, mentees will often find that in striving towards one set of goals, they have achieved a number of other things that they didn’t expect. For instance, in mastering a new skill, they may find that they have improved their self-confidence, which can have benefits that reach beyond just their industry or area of study.
The same can be said for mentors. In supporting a more junior person, you may find yourself brushing up on old skills, seeking out new ways of doing things, or just getting a chance to practise interpersonal and soft skills that you haven’t utilised as frequently. Again, this can be tricky to measure in terms of qualitative data, but can make significant, positive differences to both mentors and mentees.
Cultural Impact
On top of driving individual mentees to achieve excellence, and moving organisations further towards their overall goals, having a dedicated mentoring programme in place at your business, university, or non-profit organisation can contribute positively to organisational culture. By encouraging knowledge-sharing and investing in members of your team, you can positively influence the happiness, engagement, and productivity of everybody involved.
To cultivate a positive culture and contribute to employee, student or volunteer satisfaction, you can build mentoring frameworks that allow people to pursue their interests, build their skillsets, and develop in ways that they might not have previously thought possible. A mentoring programme, delivered in a structured and supportive way, is one of the best investments you can make in your team, and the future of your organisation.
What can senior leadership do to support good mentoring practices?
If you are part of an organisation, and keen to invest in your team’s learning and development by implementing a mentoring programme, our suite of innovative software solutions may be just the tool you need. We’ve worked alongside businesses, charities, and universities, helping them to deliver effective mentoring, with our range of purpose-built applications.
To find out what sfG MentorNet can do to help transform your operations, you can contact a member of the team, or book a free mentoring platform demonstration today. Or, for more expert insights into mentoring, coaching, and more, feel free to visit the sfG MentorNet blog for more articles like this one.